There’s a real hazard in doing a reasonable amount of swimming, the rate at which you go through swimming shorts. Most clothes generally don’t disintegrate whilst you’re wearing them. That’s not true with swimming shorts, these are the third pair this year that have malfunctioned mid-swim. They were also my favourites (known by one other regular swimmer as my Hasselhoff Shorts).

I have around ten pairs on rotation and I’d say each pair might last around a year, given how much I swim, it works out as a mean time to failure of around 70 miles (I’m assuming poncing around in the steam room after doesn’t really cause much wear and tear). It’s annoying and dangerous that you can’t tell when they might go, but the odd thing is they always tear in exactly the same place, on the front of my left leg.

• There are so many possible jokes here my brain is going into overload

  A couple of thoughts though … I don’t spend much time in the water, but when I was diving I kept my suits in shape by soaking them in fresh water for a night and letting them drip dry in the tub.

  Also, I’m not sure if it’s the pouncing (whatever that’s all about in the steam room or the heat itself. I’m not sure if suits like the heat.

  Comment by Frank Jania — August 26, 2007 @ 5:27 am

• “on the front of my left leg” - that must be a relief. I was imagining (or rather, trying not to imagine) them ripping up the seat.

  I’m going to blame the chlorine.

  Comment by Roo Reynolds — August 26, 2007 @ 10:26 pm

• Thankfully, the changing rooms are not too far away, I make a strategic exit when it looks a little bit quieter. I think if you walk slowly and with enough confidence, nobody will notice your shorts are shredded. I think.

  Comment by Darren — August 26, 2007 @ 11:05 pm

• Maybe it’s about time you started wearing Speedos!

  Comment by jessica — August 26, 2007 @ 11:58 pm

• Ha, I’m thinking that wouldn’t be my best look Jessica.

  Comment by Darren — August 27, 2007 @ 12:44 pm

• Had similar issues when I used to play waterpolo. Swim suits are only meant to survive in a good quality for about 20hrs water time. After that, they’ll deteriorate before falling apart. As Roo says, it’s the chlorine.

  Ain’t much that you can do about it either.

  Comment by Beth — September 5, 2007 @ 12:44 pm

• From what I’ve seen though, water polo is pretty vicious. It’s up there with cage fighting and figure skating. Don’t peoples swim suits often get ripped to pieces?

  Comment by Darren Shaw — September 5, 2007 @ 8:08 pm

• holy shit i would love that roller coster that would be fricken awseome where is that at??????????? my crazy beach!!!!!!!!!!! anniesefart@wordpress.com!!!!!!!1=D

  Comment by annie — November 19, 2007 @ 8:51 pm

• ok i would love that roller coster where is that place???????/

  Comment by annie — November 19, 2007 @ 8:52 pm